Seriously Silly

I once received a fortune in the ingenious delivery system the Chinese use in all of their restaurants - the cookie.  This fortune was so fitting for me and caused me to have a much greater appreciation for the little treats which carry a simple message.

The fortune said:  "You have a knack for always finding the silly in the serious."

It was as though the cookie knew me!

Just like everyone else has, I have faced challenging, difficult and even unfair situations... some of which left me heartbroken or with an unbearable emptiness.  Looking back, one of the things that has always helped me through the hardships and not left me stuck in them was the ability to find something to smile or laugh about in it.  

It seems I have developed an incredible defense against sorrow through seeking the silliness.  It isn't always easy and can require a lengthy search, but I have always found something.  Even when my Mother's life was being claimed by a devastating disease she found laughter in it and encouraged me to as well.  I was able to laugh with her at how silly she looked in the ridiculous wig she wore to cover the lack of hair from chemotherapy.  Her mistakingly putting the wig on backwards before attending my Basketball game was a blessing I will cherish all my days.  What an incredible gift she gave me.

That gift has become a big part of me.  It is my signature in dealing with difficult situations.  A little chuckle is fun.  A genuine giggle can be contagious.  And a hearty "Belly Laugh", the kind that knocks the wind out of you and, once recovered, you want to do it all over again, can be some of the best medicine.

Over the years I have had multiple experiences where I was sought out by someone who was hurting.  My time wasn't requested to offer sympathy or to lend a listening ear.  I was the "Go-to" person for a silly time of laughing and enjoying the lighter things in life - a gift I know is God-given and one I have come to truly appreciate in myself. 

On one particular occasion a friend was struggling with the wait she had to endure for some medical test results.  She was facing the possibility of a bleak diagnosis and a grueling treatment but the uncertainty was what was most agonizing.  So... out we went!  

Through a series of hilarious events that evening we laughed so hard the tears were pouring out of our eyes.  We joked with our waiter - something I always enjoy doing (though some accuse me of flirting - the jury is still out on that one) - and the giggles spilled out of us.  We received excellent service too and a "Thank You" from the server who looked forward to every stop at our table.  

Sometime... just for the fun of it... tell your waiter "I'd like my steak so rare that it could possibly recover before I begin eating it" or, "I'll have the Assorted Pies."  You could also treat the "Walk" sign at a busy intersection as an urgent warning.  Sure, you'll have people look at you like you're a complete idiot when you run across the street with your arms flailing wildly and then reach the other side with great relief, but that's the fun of it. 

As it was with that friend, finding laughter where there is pain, anxiety or great sorrow, is good for the soul.  It takes the pressure off and, at least with that dear friend, offered a solace from the seriousness.  We did talk about her situation after she received the results of her tests.  She was not given the diagnosis she feared and was relieved.  I was blessed when she expressed her appreciation for our evening together.  She confessed that when she crawled into bed that night her jaw and sides hurt from laughing so much but she recounted the events of the evening and giggled some more and fell asleep from the exhaustion from our silliness instead of her worry.

I now challenge you to do the same and seek out laughter in difficult experiences - not to make light of your situation but to promote the healing in it.  Laughter can make a huge difference!

I also have a request of you:  Please share with me a difficult situation you have faced or are in the midst of, where finding something in it to laugh at, whether small or large, was or is a significant part of the healing.  You can offer me as much or as little detail as you'd like but, at the very least, please tell me the situation and the thing you found to laugh at.  

It can be as simple as:  "My mother and best friend was dying but her backwards wig made her look like a goofball as she sat on the bleachers of my 8th grade basketball game.  We laughed when I tried to fix it and saw the tag sticking out at her eyebrow.  It was the last time she wore the ridiculous thing but the image was burned into my memory and made me laugh every time I thought about it.  It still does to this day - over 26 years later."

Here's the catch (there's always one of these):  I would love to read about your experience and be encouraged or offer encouragement to you.  I would also love to have permission to use the experiences in a book I am writing about this.  It is entitled "Seriously Funny" and will be a fiction book (at least it is at this point but could change direction and become more of an inspirational non-fiction) so I won't use your name - unless it's okay with you.

Please add your experience as a comment to this post or, if you'd prefer, you can e-mail me with it at:  sheeladaley@comcast.net.  If you e-mail it please use "Seriously Silly" as the subject.  If you want to share it with me but you don't want it shared with the world, please make a note of that for me.  Otherwise, if you share it please understand I would like permission to use it.  I won't set a deadline yet but will later, when I'm ready to wind down the book.

I look forward to crying and laughing with you.