"Please to Have... 3 Dee-gee-dow"

Strange title huh?  Believe me - I found it strange too.

I went into a Vietnamese bakery yesterday, looking forward to getting my very first "Banh Mi" sandwich.  I keep hearing about these things on Food Network shows and was determined to find out what the hype was over them.  What an experience!

It never ceases to amaze me that it doesn't take traveling a long distance to step into a completely different culture.  There in Philadelphia, just a few blocks from the Italian Market which boasts the famous Pat's and Geno's cheesesteak eateries, is a strong presence of Vietnamese culture.  We had no less than a dozen places to choose from to obtain the foodie treasure we sought.

"How did you choose?" you ask.

"With the help of an on-line search, of course," I answer respectfully.  "You can always find what you're looking for on Google."

I typed the simple phrase, "Banh M" and "Banh Mi, Philadelphia" came up as one of the choices on Google.  A listing of the top 5 Banh Mi was offered and we chose number three on the list.  We would have rather chosen #1 of course, but #3 was in the area where we were headed.

Anyway - the sandwich was good.  I'd definitely have one again but I will seek out the #1 place for the next. What was better was the time I spent in the bakery - or rather, the little piece of Vietnam I visited.

I stepped into the bakery and felt I should have had my passport stamped.  I also would have liked my English to Vietnamese dictionary or, at the very least, my computer to allow me a Google search for translation purposes.

I stepped up to order and said, with a sweet smile, "Banh Mi" please.  I'm fairly certain I said it correctly but, as with Pat's and Geno's, there is a particular way to order - and I did it wrong.

I was directed to the big board with numbers accompanying the pictures of sandwiches.  Everything else was in Vietnamese.  With 8 choices and little clue as to what meat was in the picture I chose what seemed recognizable as pork.  While they worked on preparing my Banh Mi I proceeded to pick up bottled water and then went about searching for what to spend more money on since I needed a minimum of $15 to use a credit card.

Here is where it got tricky.  I don't speak Vietnamese and none of them spoke English.  There were a few cafeteria style dishes and I wanted to try some authentic sticky rice.  I asked for the best one they had and, after the confused woman snagged another worker who spoke the best English, I selected 2 different ones.  I think one had "jack fruit" in it and the other, seemingly plain one, had some unrecognizable ingredient that filled the center.  It was completely hidden until diving in with a fork.  I still don't know what it was.

Anyway - it was truly a cultural experience.  I had not expected it to be difficult to communicate and found it very comical that I, a person who seems to have no problem voicing my opinion, fumbled through the situation and ended up with things that surprised me.  It was great fun though and I would do it all over again.

It reminded me of a time when I was working at Auntie Anne's and had a very similar experience.  That time I was the server trying to understand the sweet, quiet girl who wanted some pretzels for her and her two friends.

It was a slow weekday afternoon.  I was working the counter while the General Manager took care of rolling the pretzels.  A college-age girl of Asian ethnicity approached the counter and her friends stood a few feet behind her.  I am not sure exactly what country they were from and it didn't matter at the moment.  What mattered is that, despite her best attempts, I could not understand her.  The following is not an exaggeration of the conversation, it is verbatim:

Me:  Hello.  What can I get for you?

Her:  <swallow, look up at cashier lady, smile sweetly>  Yes... pleece to have... 3 Dee-gee-dow.  <smile sweetly, proud to have stated your order clearly>

Me:  <crickets chirping in my head.  Smile sweetly to match hers, try hard to hide complete confusion>  I'm sorry.  What was that you wanted?

I lean in closer and try to block out the sounds around me.

Her:  <look back at friends for help.  Friends look down at floor dramatically, offering no assistance.  Swallow, look at cashier lady, smile sweetly>  Yes... pleece to have... 3 Dee-gee-dow.<smile sweetly, proud to have stated your order clearly>

Me:  <maintain smile.  Maintain smile, whatever you do, maintain smile.  Look to Joanne, GM who is rolling pretzels.  Through smile, talk without moving lips>  Joanne... a little help here?  What is Dee-gee-dow?

Joanne:  <smiling at me and talking through her teeth>  I don't know.  I'm just rolling my pretzels.

I turned back to the sweet and gentle girl who just wanted a snack for her and her friends.  The last thing I wanted was to increase her discomfort.

Me:  <smiling>  I'm sorry.  Could I ask you to repeat it, one more time, but slower this time?  It's hard to hear you.

Her:  <swallow, look up at cashier lady, smile sweetly, talk much more slowly this time>  Yes...... pleece..... to..... have..... 3.....   <say last word as fast as possible>    Deegeedow.  <smile sweetly, proud to have stated your order clearly>

Me:  <louder crickets! Smiling sweetly, not believing I am no further ahead.  Try not to laugh at situation, assuming you are on candid camera>  Thank you.

In my head I kept chanting, "Deegeedow... Deegeedow... What could possibly sound like Deegeedow to her?"

I turned and looked up at the menu, hoping something would jump out at me.  Out of desperation I simply began to recite the types of pretzels, hoping something would make sense when I heard it.

Me:  Okay... we have Regular... sour crea...

Her:  Yes!  Yes!  Deegeedow.  Deegeedow.

Me:  <crickets again.  What did I say? "say them again, slowly" I tell myself>  Reg...u...lar?  (I asked, turning my head slightly to the left.)

She jumped up and down and clapped her hands.  I finally understood her.

Me:  3 Regular pretzels?

Her:  Yes!  3 Deegeedow!  3 Deegeedow!

I got the pretzels and handed them to her.  Then she got a look on her face and my heart sank.  She wanted drinks too.  I looked at her and encouraged her with my smile.

Me:  Drinks?

Her:  Yes...  please to have...

I braced myself for the ensuing struggle to comprehend her order.

Her:  2 le-mone-ade and 1 rut beer... made-eee-yum.

Me:  (excited to have clearly understood but suppressing my utter surprise since those words seemed far more difficult than "regular") 2 lemonade and 1 root beer, all medium? (I held up the cup to make sure)

Her:  <clapping her hands>  Yes...  yes... yes...

After they walked away I looked at Joanne and we both laughed heartily over the experience.  To this day I love telling that story and doing my best impression of the sweet and gentle Asian girl.

I looked up "Dee-gee-dow translation" on Google.  It asked me if I meant "Deegee Dow translation" then gave me some choices, none of which was "Regular."  I guess you can't always find exactly what you are looking for on Google.